When Strivings Cease
By Rachel Sewell
From the very beginning of our journey as Capital Fellows, we have been forewarned that October can be when things really start to pick up - when school, work responsibilities, and exhaustion are exaggerated and mental capacity is limited. Being the excited and naive person I am, in that moment I remember thinking to myself “Nope, not me!” Low and behold, we are near the end of October and these are the things which have been felt over the past few weeks.
If we know, I mean truly know, that it is because of grace we have been saved, then the pressure to be anything other than a child of God is lifted.
For the past month, life has felt a bit like a merry-go-round. The world is constant and stationary, yet I am watching it dizzily because I am the one spinning. Now there’s a fun little analogy for you! As William said in last week’s blog (way to go William), it is so easy to look at all that we have going on and to respond with grumbling. However, I have come to realize that it is not always the number of things that I have to do, the amount of schoolwork assigned, or the things required of me at work. What I have found is that it is my attitude and mindset with which I do these things. While this may sound somewhat juvenile and anything but revolutionary, I think that it is often hard to realize the posture of our hearts in matters which truly are for good and are for the Kingdom. At the surface level, I truly do want to work hard at my job because I know that in doing so I am reflecting the Lord. I desire to do well in my classes because I want to respect those who are giving up their time to teach me, and because I am eager to learn more about God’s Word. However, the Lord has been slowly revealing to me that even in my eagerness and desire to “do this season well,” my efforts will return void if I am not completely and whole-heartedly Christ-centered every step of the way. I am aware that there is a difference in the saying and the doing of this. It is easy to tell ourselves this, but in order to make the head-heart connection, there has to be more than just willing ourselves to trust God more.
Changing the motivations in which we carry out the things in our lives starts with grace. If we know, I mean truly know, that it is because of grace we have been saved, then the pressure to be anything other than a child of God is lifted. Fully knowing and believing this changes everything (shoutout to MPC’s slogan). It changes the way we work, why we work, and how we respond when work feels all consuming. I praise God for the ways he continues to mold our hearts throughout this program. I pray that we would continue to push one another to the cross daily, and that ultimately we would be reminded each day that it is not us who lives, but Christ who lives in us. And that, my friends, indeed changes everything.
And a voice came from heaven: “You are my Son, whom I love; with you I am well pleased.” Mark 1:11
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Capital Fellows is a leadership and vocational development program for recent college graduates. It's a 9-month program that includes a paid job in your field of interest, service in the church and city, a personal mentor, vocational coaching, life with a host family, and customized seminary courses to help you grow in your walk with the Lord in all areas of life.
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