Fullness of Freedom
- Capital Fellows
- Sep 19
- 4 min read
By Jessica Li
Hi everyone! I’m so excited to walk alongside you all via these blog posts this year :)
I’ll start with a fun fact: For my past few birthdays, I’ve given myself a theme phrase to embody a hope for the next year of my life. This year, I chose “fullness of freedom”. I picked this phrase because I often look to the past, and much of my life revolves around untangling myself from my memories. As a result, I frequently feel stuck — captivated by my brokenness. Well, the truth is that Christ has already set me free (Galatians 5:1 ESV), so I wanted this phrase as a reminder.
Fast forward to now, and we are almost a month into our Fellows program (wow!). I am at a new church in a new denomination, living with a new family, taking new classes, starting a new job, and settling into a completely new region. My body has been seemingly teleporting to and fro in NOVA, yet my mind often feels frozen — stuck in my college dorm or childhood home. Experiencing the “fullness of freedom” has felt like a lofty goal in a season where I’m noticing just how stuck I constantly feel.
So, where is God in this picture?
“And behold, a woman who had suffered from a discharge of blood for twelve years came up behind him and touched the fringe of his garment, for she said to herself, ‘If I only touch his garment, I will be made well.’ Jesus turned, and seeing her, he said, ‘Take heart, daughter; your faith has made you well.’ And instantly the woman was made well.” (Matthew 9:20–22 ESV)
I so deeply relate to this woman. I want to cling to Jesus. Yet I feel stuck, still in verse 21: “If I only touch his garment, I will be made well.” In my story, I don’t see Jesus turn and say, “Your faith has made you well.” And, I definitely don’t feel instantly healed. Who is this Jesus? What is missing? Why am I stuck?
I don’t have many answers, but I have faith they will be answered. I can already see how God has intentionally arranged this year with ample room for healing and growth. Though I am scared and unsure how exactly the healing will happen, I am confident He will lead me through.
Eager to grow, stay tuned!
Jessica Li is a member of the Capital Fellows class of 2025-26. She is from Richmond, VA, and is a graduate of the University of Virginia. This year, she is working at the McClerren Group in McLean, VA.
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If you know a college senior or recent graduate who should consider joining the Capital Fellows program in 2026-27, please encourage them to get in touch with us. The easiest way to express interest in the program is through our Contact Us Form. You can learn more about the program, including application deadlines, by visiting the Capital Fellows website.
About Capital Fellows. Capital Fellows is an advanced leadership and discipleship program for recent college graduates. Through graduate courses, a paid internship, one-on-one mentoring, and many leadership and community service opportunities, fellows develop and apply their gifts in real-world situations while learning to integrate a Christian worldview into all areas of life. Capital Fellows is a unique opportunity to live and work in the Washington DC area and to be an active member of a supportive community that seeks to serve the city with the love of Christ. It is also a unique opportunity to get hands-on experience in the workplace while deeply exploring God’s design for us as workers and contributors to human flourishing.
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Please pray that the fellows continue settling into their jobs and with their host families well. Their seminary classes are well underway, as is Life and Leadership, an important time with some of our pastoral staff. Please pray for the fellows as they find a healthy cadence in each of the elements of the program.
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